It’s Hard to keep an open heart.

I’m not sure what’s worse, having your heart broken or dealing with unrequited love? You have probably all felt a sense of heartbreak before, whether it’s from a serious relationship failing, from losing a relative or a friendship. But another form of this may be through loving someone that doesn’t love you back. You may find yourself absolutely in awe of someone who you know doesn’t feel in the same way about you. Your sun sets and rises on the fact that this person is existing and you spend everyday with the thought of them floating around your heart and mind. As time continues, you find that maybe you don’t love them as much as you thought and that you have found out what the hell to do with these unexpected emotions.

Sometimes, in the narcissistic manner that most of us are guilty of possessing, we forget that the things we say and do may really affect someone else’s feelings. Whether it’s because we don’t know how to own up to not sharing mutual perceptions with people or if it’s us who are being hurt. I have experienced the wanting of someone who I know does not want me back but I have also felt the guilt of knowing someone wants me when I don’t feel the same and its so difficult. It’s important that we are cautious with those who are putting their heart out and letting their guard down in order to confess feelings towards us but it’s equally as important to be honest and truthful to avoid us or themselves to avoid pain. Experiencing heartbreak can only be described as a dull, achy, heavy sensation that sits on your heart and chest all day, ever day like a pile of weights. Eventually we lighten the load by doing things which benefit our mental and physical health and things seem a lot brighter.

Personally, I’ve come across a lot of people in my life who seem to not have ownership of a heart but I have also found those who have more compassion, love and selflessness than the whole human race combined-it just depends who you accept in to your life. It’s important that we remember boyfriends and girlfriends come and go, but friendship lasts forever. I am surrounded by people who I was once extremely close to but now they have simply been consumed by their relationships and practically forgotten about their friends, the people who have always been there no matter what. It’s sad to see someone lose who they are to a relationship, I am guilty of letting a relationship change me but I am innocent in the sense that I  found myself again and re-built the foundations of friendship that began to crumble due to me being a complete wreck. These people in relationships act as if I am stupid and that I’ve never experienced what they are going through, but I have. I’ve felt all of the emotions that are provided through an intense teenage relationship and I survived when it all went to shit. Just keep going.

This post is dedicated to my close friends, family and anyone who can relate.

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